Dear Facebook "Find your Friend" Picture Tagging Feature,

You just asked me to tag the wheel of my car.



Not the front one. Just that back one.

I love you.

Love, Tanika

P.S. I don't know what that feature thing is really called, because I have my facebook language set to Pirate. It's called "Mark yer Matey" or something like that in my tongue.

Dear Person With These Feet,

This wasn't tempting to tickle you at ALL.

Love, Tanika

Dear Icy Hot,

You smell like mint. My lovely mother bought some for me to put on my legs after doing so much bending and stretching at rehearsal, and I lathered away, in my room and with the door closed.

Not two minutes later, I heard one of my roommates say to the other, "Do you smell mint?"

"Yes!" said the other, "And is smells sooooo good. Do you know what that is? It's making me hungry."

"I have no idea, but I really really want some, too."

I've stayed in my room ever since, hoping they continue to hunger after the cream on my knees.

Love, Tanika